If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
