It's Friday. Sex?
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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