I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Randomize
