My nipple is on Facebook.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
whose parrot is this?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
