We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
