Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
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