How'd it feel making her break her religion?
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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