shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
