Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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