After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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