then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
