is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i dont even know how to be here
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
