This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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