If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
This is the high leading the old right now
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Randomize
