I look better un-naked...
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
