If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
