You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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