On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
