so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
