I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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