lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize
