she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
