Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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