Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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