I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
