The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
