Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
