I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize