Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize