that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Randomize
