return my video game
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
