This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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