Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
