Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
