i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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