Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Randomize
