I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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