I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
