We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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