Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
In America we eat man semen.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
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