So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
