Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
