Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Randomize
