More tranny stories later!
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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