i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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