I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Just cropdusted the office
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
