lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Someone shit on the floor
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
