Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
