We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
