Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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